


Thank you

by Deandeanmoose



Series: Blakeleigh [5]
Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: M/M, Military
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:34:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27507700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deandeanmoose/pseuds/Deandeanmoose
Summary: Only a day late but Thank you to all the veterans out there.
Relationships: Rafael Barba/Original Male Character(s)
Series: Blakeleigh [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1606885
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	Thank you

* * *

_**Rafael** _

* * *

I like to believe I knew Blake better than anyone else, I see his little ticks and cracks when he needs me, and even when he doesn't. I love him unconditionally, something I make sure to show him... But then we have days like this. November Eleventh, veterans day. Blake isn't truly Blake on the days like these, and it shows. He doesn't have that swift charm, not as sarcastic... He is a shell till he goes to sleep. 

"Morning." I handed him a cup of coffee.

"Morning." He grumbled softly, sitting down at the small table.

"Any plans for the day?" 

He shrugged and looked over towards the front windows, "Just the usual. I'm sure you're busy..."

"No, not today. You have me."

 _**Only a small lie, I call carmen and it is a cleared day. I warned her I might yesterday anyway.**_ He raised a brow, not sure if it was a good or bad sign.

"Oh, would you like to come along then?" He seemed hesitant, but then again I only heard of what this day consisted of. Being apart of it is, well, different.

"If you'll have me." 

"Ok, of course, I would." He sipped the coffee, "It's a drive, if anything happens and we need to turn around... It'll still take a while."

"I'll warn Liv, she's head of SVU anyways now. She'll keep the calls away."

"You sure?"

 _ **Are you? You usually do this day alone and drink quite a bit.**_ Leaving those words in my head, I nodded as he smiled softly.

"Ok, we'll leave in a half-hour. Only way to make a decent time."

"Ok." I walked back to get dressed.

With a lot of overthinking, I went with jeans and a green shirt. I didn't know a dress code for this sort of thing or if it would be weird for me to dress a little more my normal. A polo or nice button-up, probably a little too much. Blake walked in and threw on his normal clothes before looking at me. He chuckled and extended a hand. 

"Sharp? Come on, we need to get moving. Coffee on me." 

I took his hand and followed him to the car. It was about seven in the morning, I wasn't truly awake as Blake started the drive out of the city. He pulled through a coffee shop drive through and got free coffee showing his military ID, a couple donuts and he took back off. 

Blake came from a military family, he grew up moving base to base with his parents and siblings. He was the second oldest of four kids, all boys. Mom was a nurse overseas, Dad was a captain. His older brother was also a marine like their dad, his younger brothers were navy and medical. They didn't talk often, once in a while Blake chatted with Luke the medic. They were cordial, remembering their family ties while John cut all ties with Blake when he came out. Their mother, Ruth, she loved talking to her boys and just keep saying they will all be together one day without petty fights, John disagrees. But Blake still claims him, he wasn't losing any more family during fights. All I know about his dad's passing, him and Blake had a rather obnoxious fight and the poor guy died before they could reconcile.

"Hey Raf, it's about three hours to pick up mom. Another two to make it to the cemetery." He looked at me, "Need the restroom? Última oportunidad hasta que lleguemos a la casa. (Last chance till we get over to the house.)"

"I'm fine. Busquemos a mami. (Let's get mommy.)" 

He settled in, "Ok. It'll be a long drive. Además, cambiaremos de vehículo allí también. (Also, we'll switch vehicles there too.)"

Frowning, I accepted that even though it wasn't something I knew about it had to be. No need to break tradition just because he wants to include me.

* * *

_**Blakeleigh** _

* * *

It was just before noon when we arrived at the old house. A few accidents and construction made it a but harder to keep time but I managed. We pulled up to the ranch home, small but perfect for Mom now that she lived with her sister only. Back when it was four boys, it was hell. I stepped out and Raf slowly followed, I could tell he was here for me and I appreciated it... I just wish he didn't look so awkward.

"She should be ready." I walked to the door but was stopped before the knock when two arms wrapped around my waist.

"My boy!" 

"Hi, mom."

Raf chuckled softly and mom waved him up, "You too son."

"Hello, Ruth." He gave her a small hug, "How are you today?"

"Alive and kicking." She stepped back, "I just had Gas put in it yesterday. All ready for the drive."

She handed me keys, walking to the garage. I waved Raf over, opening the garage door to the view of the old beat-up pickup my brother bought with all his work money. It was an extended cab, so Raf had some room to sit not in the bed of the truck. He looked shocked a moment, but did approach and take over the back seat after helping mom in. We pulled out and started on the way as Mom handed each of us a water.

"Don't dehydrate now, no need for hospital visits."

"We never plan on them mom." I smirked.

"I know, but Luke is coming this year with his family. He is home for once." She smiled, "I can't wait to see them all."

"Me either mom, Luke promised to buy dinner before we drive home."

"Luke es tu hermano menor, ¿verdad? ¿El más joven? (Luke is your younger brother, Right? The youngest one?)"

I nodded to Raf, "Yes. He is the Medic." 

"Raf, did my son tell you what we do today?"

"Not in detail really." He looked from me to mom, "Would you mind enlightening me."

"We drive Anthony's truck to Arlington. Next, we visit my late husband and Anthony's graves, leave flowers, and give a good moment of silence. After we eat dinner, catch up and drive home by seven."

"Tight time schedule, you really are a military family."

"No time to be late with the military." She jested.

"Quizás deberías seguir el ejemplo de nosotros. (Maybe you should take a cue from us.)" I caught Raf glaring at me in the rearview, "Love you too Rafi."

"Cute." He rolled his eyes.

"Has Blake ever told you about Anthony? They were Irish twins and people swore real twins at times." Ruth went on, "When he passed, I swore I lost two sons that day. Blake was so lost, if it wasn't for his brothers on his team he would've joined Anthony."

I didn't look from the road, refusing to crack right now. Mom would tell Raf everything, she loved talking about her sons. About the loving times as a family and the crazy times... But he always had to talk about me and Anthony like we were one, after all, we acted like one. I never told Raf the story, but mom will with no holds.

"Anthony was Army like Blake, he was aiming for green beret when he was killed during a training mission. The parachute didn't deploy." She sighed, "He, like his father, died on his birthday... Today."

"Today?"

"Yes, my husband was born on veterans day as was my oldest. They both died on this day as well. My son by training accident and my husband on duty. He was rescuing a stranded group on a helicopter when it was shot down."

"I'm sorry." He sat back with less of a smile.

 _ **I never told you because I can hardly hold it together... Sorry Raf, It's a rough subject. Just like your dad.**_ I kept up the speed and we pulled through the gates on time, driving slowly to the graves. As we got close, Luke amd his wife were pulling their two kids in tight so we could park before they went crazy again. They were already bouncing and waving at us when I turned rhe key back.

"Took you long enough." Luke laughed as Ruth pointed to him with a shaky hand, "You are never late mother."

"And we are not yet. We have five minutes to spare even starting late." She hugged him as he helped her down before Rag got out behind her, "Have you met Rafael?"

"Yes, mother." He shook Raf's hand, "Been a while, tour dates are crazy."

"So is my work." Raf smiled as his wife Amy hugged him before the kids did.

Luke was my only defender when I came out as gay. John was furious and always made mom keep me away from the house since I was an adult and he was still a teen, Luke played peacemaker around the house. Mom did ask me to keep distance till John graduated, but the moment he did and enlisted she had me visiting more. Even when he got married and had his two kids, Luke made sure to keep me involved even from a distance away. He was stationed in California, they always flew out for Veterans Day to be a full family. 

"Hi, uncle Rafa." The kids laughed and waved at me.

I wanted to get out but I needed that moment in the truck alone. Raf looked my way but I heard Mom motion everyone to the graves. I rubbed the steering wheel, felt the leather in my hands and smirked. The old fashion cassette player had a Lynyrd Skynyrd tape stuck in it, Anthony jammed it in by accident. It took a moment for my brain to catch up with reality, for my emotions to settle enough to go up there. I picked up the flowers from the back seat and walked up to the grave where my family stood.

"Anthony, god bless your soul my old son." Ruth kissed her hand and rested it on the gravestone, "We brought a full bunch today. You've heard about Blake's husband Rafael before, He came along this time."

I gave a small psssp, like you would to gain a cat's attention, and motioned Raf over. Separating the flowers, I had him hold a few as I got them split for everyone. The kids went first and laid the first one down for their uncle and then everyone went one by one. Raf laid one down and stood slowly, leaning into me as I followed suit. Next came dad, Mom went first and was tearing up as she spoke to him. I and Luke stepped up and hugged her as she was crying, we got her calmed down and moved on. Everyone stood for a long moment of silence, then we left Mom alone with dad for a few minutes... Then it was my turn. Everyone stood by the cars so I could have a few minutes.

"Hey, dad... Anthony. Long time. I have been doing great at work, they were even talking about a promotion. Not that I wanted to really, I like where I am. You might not be as proud dad but, I like where I am. Time at home with my husband, my brothers are friends and I am good with my team alone." I took a shaky breath, "Everything is going well. Raf even came this year, didn't make him he asked me."

I look between the stones and slowly stood, "Well, I miss you both."

A tear slipped down my cheek and fell at my brother's feet. I wiped it up and gave a salute before walking back for Luke to go. As we stood waiting to go to dinner, a family was walking by when a girl turned to me.

"Are you a veteran?"

"Lilly." Her mom caught her hand.

"Mom." She pulled back and looked up, "Are you, sir?"

"It's fine." I nodded to the woman and crouched down, "Yes, yes I am."

"Thank you." She gave a very over-enthusiastic salute to me, so I stood and returned it.

The family took off and Luke walked over with a puffy face before we all slowly left. Getting in the truck, Raf took my hand and didn't say a word till Mom said we needed to get moving. It felt peaceful, more than the drive here was even. Then we got to the restaurant and ate quickly under mom's rules. She was clear we needed to be on our way home by a decent time today, I didn't fight her on it and Raf didn't mind... Then we were sitting in silence as we waited on her to get done in the bathroom so we could get her and the truck home.

"Blake?"

"Yeah?" I looked at Raf as he held my hand.

"This is Anthony's truck?"

"Yeah... He blew all his savings since he was six on it." I smirked, "Everyone said it was stupid, but we really thought he was cool. He was the first one with a car out of all of us."

"I never had siblings or a good father really," he cleared his throat, "But, it doesn't make you emotional?"

"It does." I nodded, "My brother loved classic rock and country music. Lynyrd Skynyrd is stuck in the cassette player. He paid for leather seats because he thought they were cool and reminded him of when dad would let us ride along with him before he sold his truck."

He smiled as my face twisted up, "The backseat has no seat belts because he cut them out after we tied them all together as a prank one year... The cigarette tray is full of plastic army men as a joke, he was the golden child of the four and he joined the army as soon as they would take him."

"What else?" 

"The bed is empty now but under the spare tire he strapped down is a first aid kit filled with alcohol. Mom didn't like us drinking, even when it was legal so... He covered for all of us." I flipped up the seat cushion armrest thing, "Under hear is a massive paint stain, he bought me a paintball gun and we were playing with it when it accidentally went off. He just chose to hide it and hope mom never notice... Then I accidentally shot his bedroom door and mom found out."

Mom came out and the chatting stopped, we moved on back to drop her off. Once at the house, I sat an extra few minutes in the truck as Raf helped mom out and In. I finally got out and was walking the keys in when Raf caught my hand.

"Hey, Blake, Wanna take a drive?"

"We would be pushing it and you have work in the morning..."

"It won't hurt me, Ya saco toda la noche para trabajar. (I already pull all-nighters for work.)"

Mom looked surprised but dropped her hand so I couldn't hand the keys back, "I mean... If you are fine with it. Sure."

* * *

**_Rafael_ **

* * *

I climbed in the passenger seat, smiling as Blake got back in. He started the truck and slowly pulled out, moving out of the small city to the back roads. I watched his body relax and saw a true look at happiness on this rough day.

"It's been years since I've driven this girl around for fun."

"So it's a girl." I teased.

"I might be gay, but my brother was very straight." He laughed, "Man, this brings back memories."

"Taking girls to lovers lane?" I rolled my eyes as he lifted his brows.

"Really? Sr. Bisexual ... Te adelantaste. Era mi amigo y estaba experimentando. (Mr. Bisexual... You got ahead of yourself. It was my friend and it was experimenting.)"

"That's my bad boy." I laughed as he reached over and put an arm around me.

"You know what, this is good. We need music now." He hit play and I flashback to a younger weirder me... Lynyrd Skynyrd, "What you feeling? Free bird or Simple man."

"Whatever." I closed my eyes and smiled at the small rumble of the truck and how happy Blake was looking. 

It was after a few minutes the rumble had more a bounce, I open my eyes to a dirt road. Rocks were flinging in the fleeting sunset, dusk was heavy around us. Sitting up, Blake laughed and motioned to his seatbelt.

"I'd buckle in."

I slid away and buckled in as he took a few rough turns. I found a small handle by the top of the door and gripped it for dear life as he actually lost control and was sliding on the rocks before regaining control. _**I didn't know how much of a country boy he was... He seems much more military at home.**_ We turned and he slowed down as I realized we had got higher up after that rough road.

"Where are we?"

"Lover's lane." He smirked.

"Well, there isn't room for third base in this truck." I glanced over as he laughed.

"In the bed there is. Qué es esa vieja línea? (What's that old line?)" He tapped the steering wheel, "I got an eight-foot bed that never needs made."

"Not this time." I chuckled as he turned it over to the radio and found a Spanish music channel and glanced over as I switched it, "Cute."

"Oh, come on. Podría cantar ese. (I could sing that one.)"

"I don't know about you sometimes." 

He pulled up and parked at a log, nodding to look forward. We had a gorgeous view of the town from above and stars starting to appear above. Growing up in the city, I never saw anything like this. It was a different side of Blake I was seeing, a gorgeous side of him... He was like a child again.

"Blake, do you ever miss this life?"

"Everyday." He nodded and looked over to see my face drop a little, "Pero no tanto como te extrañaría y lo feliz que eres cada día que vengo a casa contigo. O la forma en que me recibes en la puerta después de cada recorrido. (But not as much as I would miss you and how happy you are every day I come home to you. Or the way you greet me at the gate after every tour.)"

"I get it, no tienes que ser cursi. (you don't have to be sappy.)" 

He laughed before glancing back over to the cliffside, "By the way, I can't believe no one has called you today."

"I wouldn't know." I shrugged as he turned to me.

"How's that?"

"Lo deje en casa. La única forma de garantizar la paz. (I left it at home. Only way to ensure we got peace.)" I adjusted to kick my feet up the best I could.

"You did what? ¿Y si hubiera una emergencia? (What if there was an emergency?)"

"It would've taken hours to get there anyways." 

"Now who's the bad boy?" He winked at me, "I gotta watch you now."

We both laughed as he started the truck back up and were on our way back to return the truck. Having a less than pleased look at the new song, Blake switched stations and his hand paused as the song started. He went to change it but couldn't get his finger to put pressure on it.

> _Eighty-nine cents in the ash tray_   
>  _Half empty bottle of Gatorade rolling in the floorboard_   
>  _That dirty Braves cap on the dash_   
>  _Dog tags hanging from the rearview_   
>  _Old Skoal can, and cowboy boots and a Go Army Shirt_   
>  _Folded in the back_   
>  _This thing burns gas like crazy, but that's alright_   
>  _People got their ways of coping_   
>  _Oh, and I've got mine_

"Blake? You Ok?"

"Yeah." He found the pressure and changed the song, so I switched it back as he took a deep breath.

"What is it?"

"This song, it always makes me go back."

"Is it really a bad thing?"

"I don't know." He took a sharp breath and drove slow as I rest my hand over his on the stick in the middle as he stopped in the middle of the stones.

> _I leave that radio playing_   
>  _Same old country station where you left it_   
>  _Yeah, man I crank it up_   
>  _And you'd probably punch my arm right now_   
>  _If you saw this tear rolling down on my face_   
>  _Hey, man I'm trying to be tough_   
>  _And Momma asked me this morning, if I'd been by your grave_   
>  _But that flag and stone ain't where I feel you anyway_

"We should get home." He spoke in the silence.

"I'm not driving Blake." 

He looked up and pulled his hand from the gearshift, "I... Yeah. Sorry."

"Blake?"

> _I drive your truck_   
>  _I roll every window down and I burn up_   
>  _Every back road in this town_   
>  _I find a field, I tear it up_   
>  _Till all the pain's a cloud of dust_   
>  _Yeah, sometimes I drive your truck_
> 
> _I've cussed, I've prayed, I've said goodbye_   
>  _Shook my fist and asked God why_   
>  _These days when I'm missing you this much_

He slowly lifted his foot and shifted his foot to slowly get the truck moving. I put my hand on his shoulder and watched him soften under it. He shifted the gear and then reached up to hold my hand a minute.

"Hey, Raf?"

"Yeah." 

"Thank you."

"No problem."

> _I drive your truck_   
>  _I roll every window down_   
>  _And I burn up_   
>  _Every back road in this town_   
>  _I find a field, I tear it up_   
>  _Till all the pain's a cloud of dust, yeah sometimes,_   
>  _Brother sometimes_
> 
> _I drive your truck_   
>  _I drive your truck_   
>  _I hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind_   
>  _I drive your truck_

**Author's Note:**

> Only a day late but Thank you to all the veterans out there.


End file.
